Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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