Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
