Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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