weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize