So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
How does it feel to date your dad?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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