at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
