For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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