I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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