I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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