well you can't waste a boner
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I stole a fireplace last night.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize