it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
