WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
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