just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
