Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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