We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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