the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just want nice things and good sex
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
