hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Randomize
