I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
