Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
