how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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