Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize