My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
