My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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