im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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