I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
