i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
