Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Just cropdusted the office
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
