My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Randomize
