So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize