Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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