That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Randomize
