is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize