hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize