If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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