David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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