I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
