ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
