Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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