Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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