It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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