we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
