why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
