Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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