hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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