You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
