i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Also, beer. Big fan.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
