just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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