toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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