I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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