omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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