Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
