i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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